19 August 2010

On Flirting...

I realized recently [or, rather, RE-realized] that I flirt WAY too much. Especially when I'm not interested in a guy. It's just so easy. And way too fun. And, honestly, it's flattering when they flirt back. So...maybe I perpetuate some of the negative feelings guys have about girls and mixed signals and whatnot [Though I've got stories up the yin-yang about guys and mixed signals... Enough to make you cringe, if not assume the fetal position in horror]. Maybe I'm okay with that?

I was talking to my former home teacher [and really awesome friend!] about this the other night, and he agreed with my assessment. He was like, "Yeah, you ARE really good at flirting, and a LOT." Something like that. [Thanks, Eric! Love ya! ;)] He reminded me of the time when I had two guys fighting over me. Not seriously angry fighting, but they literally began to wrestle in front of me [Each trying to prove their strength and manliness or something? I don't know...].

A good friend always jokes with me about how I have the guys next door wrapped around my pretty little finger. He tells me I can pretty much get them to do anything for me. All I have to do is bat my eyes and ask sweetly and they're like butter in my hands. I try not to take advantage of that [at least, not too often], but it's nice to know.

I'm trying to test an idea I have. In my experience, using a person's name can be really effective. I LOVE when people use my name when they're talking to me. It just makes everything so much more personal. I don't think I do it often enough, so I'm consciously trying to do it more. Especially when talking to guys. Everytime I see a guy I know, I'm trying to go out of my way to say "Hi John!" [Or, you know, whatever his name is.] with a big smile instead of the ever-typical "Hey" with a goofy grin or [worse] grunt with a head-nod. My new efforts are being well-received so far. What I'm testing is whether or not any of the guys will start to initiate. I think they will. And, despite my level of interest in the guy, it's always nice to have that sort of friendship and connection.

That reminds me of a few years back. I had a friend who I'd always say hi to. Once we became better friends, he asked me about "the time I was interested in him." I was confused at first, but he told me he thought I really liked him because I always seemed so happy to see him. I wasn't at all interested in being more than friends, but it certainly got me thinking.

Anyway, I flirt a lot. It's fun. It's exciting. And I'm not sorry about it [for the most part, until some people go on and on about my being a heart-breaker. Psh.]. Anyone have any good new tactics or advice for me? :)

3 comments:

Erin Day said...

I flirt. A lot. Especially with boys that I'm not particularly interested in. Which has led to multiple problems. And many hilarious stories...

Erin Day said...

P.S. I'll see you at the next week thing. I'm super excited!

Kate Challis said...

Hey so, this basically describes my exact attitude while Danny was on his mission. So, I have quite a lot of opinions about it. I know you asked for some advice, but I don't want to give you unsolicited advice that you don't want, so I will just offer that if you want my $.02, I would LOVE to discuss this matter further via email or facebook or whatever.

I guess I will say one thing, that you probably already know when you think about it deeply: sometimes being the queen of the flirts leaves you feeling totally miserable. Don't despair though, because this phase of your life will pass and it won't always be like this :)

Great blog, ps.